Bird Beak Nose

A classy and sophisticated accessory, the Bird Beak Nose is carefully crafted from only the finest PVC available on the market. Each piece is thoroughly inspected by only the most discerning Nobel prize winning ornithologists, and then presented to real live chickens for final approval. If they cluck once, it means it means they say “yes” and the Bird Beak Nose passes its final test. If they cluck twice, it means “yes yes,” which makes it doubly high quality. If they cluck three times they are sold to KFC as punishment for insubordination.

The Bird Beak Nose looks just like a giant, realistic, smiling chicken beak complete with tongue and saucy red waddle. Keep one in your car so you can quickly put it on if you ever get pulled over by a cop. He’ll appreciate how artfully you’ve defused what could have been an awkward situation and let you go on your way. We assume this actually works!